back in the saddle

I'm back, yay!  but also I'm back, boo!

Jamaica:  awesome.

Filled with beautiful flowers, soft white sandy beaches, and energetic, child-like, friendly Jamaicans.  

The best part:  spending time with good friends and being adventurous / taking new risks / letting loose / having fun / being carefree

Coming back I felt so light and airy, with no cares in the world.  I had forgotten that work / family / time even existed and David and I enjoyed a few days of post-vacation basking at home.  Yesterday I looked forward to going back to work and felt energized and ready to take charge.  It lasted about 35 minutes.  By the time I finished checking all my emails, I was ready for a cocktail break.  My attention span = tiny, my motivation = tinier, my patience = non-existent.  Going on vacation makes me wish that I was mega wealthy and could travel 24/7, with no job.

blurg.

Of course, after any vacation, I am re-evaluating life and what direction I want it to go.  Do I want to stay where I am?  Do I have the means to get where I want to go?  Can David just do all the hard work for me so I can ride his coat tails and not have to worry about all these big life questions?  In my freakin dreams.  It's all so scary and I'm avoiding taking the GRE, talking to advisors, buying a house, moving away, etc. because I fear that I'll get rejected or will find out my goals are farther out of my reach than I thought.

blurg.

Anyways, on a better note, here are some memorable moments from our trip : ) in no particular order

I've spent the last week eating non-stop and indulging in my cravings, and all that fatty food and huge servings has made me feel sick and yucky.  Back on the health food wagon (McDonald's pushed me over the edge last night).

cheers!

Let the countdown begin. . .

Now that the Michalski adventure is over and my rage has subsided, my thoughts turn to sand between my toes, blended tropical drinks and floating in the blue ocean.  Vacation will officially start at 06:00 am on Saturday morning and hopefully the Jamaican air traffic controllers will settle their strike, and all the bad weather will move out of Dallas before then.

I have all the bathing suits / flip flops / sundresses I need and now just have to think about what / how to pack it all.  D on the other hand has only bought one set of board shorts and already wants to return them so he may just be sans clothing.

Sorry, I promise I'll stop talking about Jamaica soon...

In other news, I have been babysitting my nephew a TON lately, and on Sunday we took a morning trip to the BioPark.  It was a beautiful day. See below:

 

 

 

Lucky Numbers

So if you didn't already know...I kinda have a thing for the number 22.  Who knows if it's because my brain is trained to look for it, or if the universe aligns to give me little signs that things are good, but I see 22 everywhere.  I catch the time at :22 after the hour at least 4 times a day, and usually catch 11:11 once a day.  I often get receipts where the total ends in .22 cents.  (By the way I just looked at the clock and it's 11:21 right now-- my brain is right on time -- now it's 11:22).  Of course my birthday is on the 22nd also, and last night I started reading "Bel Canto" (thanks JD) and in the first few pages it states how the main character's bday is also October 22...so of course I'll finish the book because I know it is meant to be.  When I see 22 I feel at ease and like things are meant to be.  When I started at PRN, JD and HM started on the same day as me and they share the same birthday of October 11, which adds up to my birthday October 22.  Anyways, I could go on and on and on, but my point is that I like these auspicious dates / numbers / coincidences.

Here are some interesting facts my dad forwarded to me about 2011:

1. This year, July has 5 Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays.  This happens only every 823 years.
2. This year has quite a few unusual dates:  1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11
3. Now the craziest one of all:  Take the last two digits of the year in which you were born - now add
   the age you will be this year, the results will be 111 for everyone in whole world (unless you were born after 2000, then it will add up to 11)

Lets just let that soak in for a little bit...
 

:)

perspectivity

So my house is overrun with Michalski men right now...and how am I feeling?  (well lets just say I'm feeling lots of things but not gonna lay it all out on the table right now -- but you can make the safe assumption that they aren't positive emotions).  I really like being around family and encourage David to spend time and be supportive of his family, but I REALLY value my quiet time, personal space, and the ease of my lifestyle.  Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Anyways, while they went to watch Thor, I went grocery shopping (lately it feels like retail therapy since I've been nuts about cooking for myself) and got some perspective on the big wide world.  The world is not propelled through space by Michalskis, it's safe to assume that nobody at the store has the last name "Michalski,"  there are far more serious problems in this world than those in the Michalski clan.

Things at the store that reminded me I'm still on planet Earth and not on planet M:  the guy behind me in line didn't use any bags for his produce and brought his own box to take the groceries home, what an eco-conscious human being...I was embarrassed of my 15+ plastic bags.  There was a lady with one leg hobbling around the parking lot asking for money.  I said I didn't have cash and she didn't even bother finishing her sob story, she just headed to the next person in the lot.  As I got into my car I saw people walking the long way to their cars just to avoid her and even though it may be safe to assume she lost her leg to something drug related, the sun had just set and I felt terrible that here she is, probably feeling as shitty, depressed and low as anyone could ever feel, and she is not going home to eat dinner or sleep in a bed and does not have a houseful of family members waiting for her.  Nobody deserves to feel like that.

Anyways, so I came home humbled by my store excursion (by the way it felt great to drive in a car ALL ALONE for the first time in days) and made some EatingWell.com Chicken Noodle Soup.  I cooked and rocked out til the boys came back home, and I feel a little better than I did before they left.  I'm just gonna quietly keep to myself for the rest of the night and let them talk / dramatize amongst themselves.

(for some reason blogger won't upload the pics of my soup -- i think the Michalskis are hogging the bandwidth with their cpus -- so instead I'm uploading pics of my beautiful dogs who make me happy and keep me sane)

Tomorrow I'm having lunch with a friend who is leaving to the Army on Tuesday and bc I'm a HUGE wuss, I know I'm gonna tear up.  So much stuff all going on at once!  I'm soooo mentally exhausted and feel like tomorrow's goodbye will just be the icing on the emotional cake.  sigh.  Please Jesus, let me wake up tomorrow morning to discover it is May 28 / time to fly to Jamaica, and that I can leave and avoid this last week in Michalski limbo.  :)

family bo bamily

Today is a nice little break from the 'Michalski Family Extravaganza" which will be in full swing by tomorrow.  D's dad and his girlfriend arrived from New Hampshire on Sunday night and we mingled, ate, entertained, chatted, and then they headed out to Northern NM for a little road trip.  They will be back tomorrow and D's brother, sister-in-law and niece will fly in from Virginia late in the evening. 

It's not often that this family has all of its members together and only maybe once a year do all of D's brothers meet up, so it will definitely be an extravaganza.  It's also the first time that D's niece has been to NM and met all the extended family.  It'll be busy busy busy.  They all have a lot to catch up on, and  I will be behind the scenes making sure everyone sleeps well, has clean towels, is fed, and has transportation.  :)

It will be interesting to see how we balance going back and forth between D's mom and dad and making sure that no one is being neglected and that everyone gets to visit enough.  I'm very thankful that my parents have a relationship of tolerance and that we can all have parties and have fun even though my parents are divorced (my mom's patience has a lot to do with how well we all get along).  D's parents aren't quite as friendly towards eachother as mine are and it makes for a lot of running back and forth between the two.  I know there is a lot of history and drama and emotions involved, so it's much safer to keep them separated, but I have a very 'Full House' wish that we could all just be one big happy family.  I know I can't control how all the Michalskis will get along, but at least I can do my best to make sure everyone is having a good time in their own respective places.

Someday when I have my own family, I will do everything in my absolute power to make sure we all stay together and get along and so my kids don't have to worry about splitting holidays with both parents, or inviting divorced parents to the same function.  It's no fun and it's too much stress for kids to deal with, even when they are 27 years old.

Ahhhh family, a blessing and a curse.